Only, I wouldn’t have the guts to do it. I’d just stand there, trying to look tough. What I might do, I might say something very cutting and snotty, to rile him up – instead of socking him in the jaw.
I am always saying ‘Glad to’ve met you’ to somebody I’m not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though.
I went over to my window and opened it and packed a snowball with my bare hands... I didn’t throw it at anything though. I started to throw it... But I changed my mind.
I’m just going through a phase right now. Everybody goes through phases and all, don’t they?
I said old Jesus probably would’ve puked if He could see it – all those fancy costumes and all.
What really knocks me out is a book that, when you’re all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn’t happen much, though.
Catholics are always trying to find out if you’re Catholic.
That’s the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty, even if they’re not much to look at, or even if they’re sort of stupid, you fall half in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. Girls. They can drive you crazy. They really can.
If you want to know the truth, the guy I like best in the Bible, next to Jesus, was that lunatic and all, that lived in the tombs and kept cutting himself with stones.
Lots of times you don’t know what interests you most till you start talking.
He told us we should always pray to God – talk to Him and all – wherever we were. He told us we ought to think of Jesus as our buddy and all.
It’s funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they’ll do practically anything you want them to.